You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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