I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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