My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Randomize