Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize