Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
soo... how was my night?
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