wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
Randomize
