I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
