I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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