they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Randomize
