I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
we should paint friendship bongs
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