How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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