There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
there was a trapeze. enough said
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Randomize
