I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
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