i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Randomize