I just made out with a guy for $7.
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
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