White coat. Heels.
I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Randomize
