its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I am mentally ready for anal.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
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