what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Randomize