Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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