I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
