And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Randomize
