shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Randomize