Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
