Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Randomize
