Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Randomize
