I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Randomize
