So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
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