Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Randomize
