She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Randomize
