doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
Randomize
