THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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