We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
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