So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
