so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
