If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Randomize
