sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Randomize
