UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize
