I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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