You're completely useless in the revolution.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
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