all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
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