the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
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