That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
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