Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
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