Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
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