WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Randomize
