North Korea, Best Korea!
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
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