beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
