Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Randomize