Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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