Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
