and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
